[ It’s been a minute or two and he’s at the verge of trying again when he realizes another text’s come in, must have pinged sometime in the midst of reading Vitaly’s last message. If Nova isn’t entirely in the mood for reading whatever Sen’s sent - no fault against Sen; just Wilco had a point about being careful, and maybe Nova doesn’t want to think about that now - he figures it’s wisest to… Well. Just see if there’s anything at all to either alleviate or drive home the sense of drowning.
So yes, he opens the message and yes he reads and it’s—
Well. It’s puzzling, is what that is.
Because there’s divorce having been accomplished, and there’s divorce in early talks, never having gotten carried out at all. Or there’s the prospect of remarriage, and maybe Vitaly’s got a knack for drawing into shite situations. Neither options sits well with Nova. Neither seems right for this man; neither seems like life, or anything beyond a wretched colliding of circumstances.
(Not that Nova knows. Not that he knows much of anything, but there’s Sen to ask further questions of, and if nothing else, Nova knows what he feels, and knows what he read from Vitaly Kozak.)
He’s heard the name ‘Madeline’ before; he’s fairly certain of it. Talked of as among the ranks of Deimos’s prick of a brother, always with acerbity.
(He doesn’t like to think of anyone sinking fangs into this man, drinking him dry. It isn’t fucking right. Shouldn’t fucking be permitted.)
Something more: For all Sen’s talk of Vitaly’s social faint-heartedness and propensity for vanishing (talk Nova doesn’t doubt, because sure Sen talks shit here and there, but he’s got an eye for observation of his fellow beings), Vitaly hasn’t retreated. Didn’t hide behind those attempts at claiming distance, either
There’s another message from (Talik) Vitaly. A sense of something settling back into place, warming itself again as Nova reads ‘Vevay,’ thinks he might have, must have smiled at that, a little bit. In spite of the mess at hand, in spite of how hopeless everything looked mere minutes ago—
Well.
Maybe all’s not lost, after all. ]
[ … ]
I’m feeling that hollow myself, that’s so.
You didn’t misunderstand a word of what I said or what I was speaking after.
Can be I’m too free with my expressing, too quick with the draw. Didn’t give you much chance for a breath, did I? Only it isn’t often I feel thisDon’t know I’ve ever felt quite so
Eh, well. Point being, you heard me right.
I know what I feel, and there’s no taking that back. Wouldn’t want to, anyhow. I’ll take a burst across the sky over blankness any day, no matter how the afterburn might ache. I can take a little burning. Can take a lot of burning, is the thing about me, and a moment’s hopes worth a life’s scar, sometimes.
I can’t say it doesn’t strangle, this about your wife [ … ] you being married. Can’t say it didn’t set the world off all its axes.
Still, I’d rather know, and there’s courage in offering over the truth, especially if any kind of [ … ] reciprocation’s involved, speaking in the way of feeling. [ … ] Going to guess it wasn’t easy speaking. And it means something, more than a little something, your saying the cause of your trembling.
You’ve not gone into hiding behind guises or silence. You’ve gone the mile to take down a feint or two that slipped in. I appreciate that, more than words tell.
Anyway. I’ve been walked into worse situations blind.
Be clear, I’m not faulting you, Vitaly. It’s no fault of yours I come on strong. [ … ] No fault of yours how you feel, either. Getting the impression there’s circumstances hard enough on you without your own recriminations on yrself.
[ … ]
There’s kindness in you, worlds of it I think. Not changing my mind on that point.
[ … ]
[ … ]
Look. I’ve got no mind to compromise you, put you at the centre of anything you want no part in. Or, fuck that ain’t right, nay, talk it apart from wanting, more I don’t want you compromising yourself, yeah? Feeling you’re less you and I’ve led you to it.
Thing is, I’m not sure you’re not already three feet down beneath the ocean’s floor. Something’s got you drowned and buried, Talik. Something’s got you forgetting how to breathe.
So I’m about to pose a question, but I want it known I won’t hold you to an answer. If it hits you awry, if you want to or if you need to close down talk of this, I mean your marriage, only say the word. [ … ] Can’t promise I’ll leave it lie forever, but I won’t pry at it this night.
Plenty elsewise we can speak of, I figure.
[ … ]
Yeah. The question, though. You say you’re unhappy in this marriage and I don’t doubt you, don’t think you’d be feigning and also two years tells something on its own. So
What’s keeping you with it?
Answer or don’t. Like I said, I’m not looking to make this harder for you or force your hand on anything. Not here for judgment, neither.
Been married once myself. For the sake of disclosure, or I mean to say I get shite happens. Partnerships that go sour one way or another. Marriages that’re rotten from the start. There’re reasons folks split and there’re reasons they stick.
Fuck if I ain’t starting to lose my own plot. Point being, what I said, answer or don’t, and tell me to shove off with it if that’s best. What’s it you need Vitaly, hey?
Beyond that.
Happens I’ve also got no wish to cease this discourse we’ve got going.
So whatever you say to the above, my ask is you keep on sticking with me here. Night’s long, yeah, and we’ve only just started on talking. So here’s the thing, then, as long as you can
Be with me still, as a friend, if by no other name.
no subject
So yes, he opens the message and yes he reads and it’s—
Well. It’s puzzling, is what that is.
Because there’s divorce having been accomplished, and there’s divorce in early talks, never having gotten carried out at all. Or there’s the prospect of remarriage, and maybe Vitaly’s got a knack for drawing into shite situations. Neither options sits well with Nova. Neither seems right for this man; neither seems like life, or anything beyond a wretched colliding of circumstances.
(Not that Nova knows. Not that he knows much of anything, but there’s Sen to ask further questions of, and if nothing else, Nova knows what he feels, and knows what he read from Vitaly Kozak.)
He’s heard the name ‘Madeline’ before; he’s fairly certain of it. Talked of as among the ranks of Deimos’s prick of a brother, always with acerbity.
(He doesn’t like to think of anyone sinking fangs into this man, drinking him dry. It isn’t fucking right. Shouldn’t fucking be permitted.)
Something more: For all Sen’s talk of Vitaly’s social faint-heartedness and propensity for vanishing (talk Nova doesn’t doubt, because sure Sen talks shit here and there, but he’s got an eye for observation of his fellow beings), Vitaly hasn’t retreated. Didn’t hide behind those attempts at claiming distance, either
There’s another message from (Talik) Vitaly. A sense of something settling back into place, warming itself again as Nova reads ‘Vevay,’ thinks he might have, must have smiled at that, a little bit. In spite of the mess at hand, in spite of how hopeless everything looked mere minutes ago—
Well.
Maybe all’s not lost, after all. ]
[ … ]
I’m feeling that hollow myself, that’s so.
You didn’t misunderstand a word of what I said or what I was speaking after.
Can be I’m too free with my expressing, too quick with the draw. Didn’t give you much chance for a breath, did I?
Only it isn’t often I feel thisDon’t know I’ve ever felt quite soEh, well. Point being, you heard me right.
I know what I feel, and there’s no taking that back. Wouldn’t want to, anyhow. I’ll take a burst across the sky over blankness any day, no matter how the afterburn might ache. I can take a little burning. Can take a lot of burning, is the thing about me, and a moment’s hopes worth a life’s scar, sometimes.
I can’t say it doesn’t strangle, this about
your wife[ … ] you being married. Can’t say it didn’t set the world off all its axes.Still, I’d rather know, and there’s courage in offering over the truth, especially if any kind of [ … ] reciprocation’s involved, speaking in the way of feeling. [ … ] Going to guess it wasn’t easy speaking. And it means something, more than a little something, your saying the cause of your trembling.
You’ve not gone into hiding behind guises or silence. You’ve gone the mile to take down a feint or two that slipped in. I appreciate that, more than words tell.
Anyway. I’ve been walked into worse situations blind.
Be clear, I’m not faulting you, Vitaly. It’s no fault of yours I come on strong. [ … ] No fault of yours how you feel, either. Getting the impression there’s circumstances hard enough on you without your own recriminations on yrself.
[ … ]
There’s kindness in you, worlds of it I think. Not changing my mind on that point.
[ … ]
[ … ]
Look. I’ve got no mind to compromise you, put you at the centre of anything you want no part in. Or, fuck that ain’t right, nay, talk it apart from wanting, more I don’t want you compromising yourself, yeah? Feeling you’re less you and I’ve led you to it.
Thing is, I’m not sure you’re not already three feet down beneath the ocean’s floor. Something’s got you drowned and buried, Talik. Something’s got you forgetting how to breathe.So I’m about to pose a question, but I want it known I won’t hold you to an answer. If it hits you awry, if you want to or if you need to close down talk of this, I mean your marriage, only say the word. [ … ] Can’t promise I’ll leave it lie forever, but I won’t pry at it this night.
Plenty elsewise we can speak of, I figure.
[ … ]
Yeah. The question, though. You say you’re unhappy in this marriage and I don’t doubt you, don’t think you’d be feigning and also two years tells something on its own. So
What’s keeping you with it?
Answer or don’t. Like I said, I’m not looking to make this harder for you or force your hand on anything. Not here for judgment, neither.
Been married once myself. For the sake of disclosure, or I mean to say I get shite happens. Partnerships that go sour one way or another. Marriages that’re rotten from the start. There’re reasons folks split and there’re reasons they stick.
Fuck if I ain’t starting to lose my own plot. Point being, what I said, answer or don’t, and tell me to shove off with it if that’s best. What’s it you need Vitaly, hey?
Beyond that.
Happens I’ve also got no wish to cease this discourse we’ve got going.
So whatever you say to the above, my ask is you keep on sticking with me here. Night’s long, yeah, and we’ve only just started on talking. So here’s the thing, then, as long as you can
Be with me still, as a friend, if by no other name.
Can’t say I won’t miss the name, only
Well. That’s enough from me for now likely