[ Being given the choice all over again is difficult. Because it'd be easy to shake his head no, just breathe the word and that would be that. She wouldn't be mad at him. She promised she wouldn't be disappointed. (Could she help being just a little disappointed, though? Or sad, at least. The thoughts tugs him down to inevitability. Is he always going to make sadness, make trouble for her? It's a hard thought to stomach. It's—) He can't fall into that. Hey, she's right here with him. Focus on her, instead. That little tug she's given him, so familiar so welcome in all her motions, moving but not leaving him. Still here with him. Always, always here.
All of this feels like a lot of responsibility. A lot of oncoming failure. This choice is... small, but it isn't.
He does want to try. (Hasn't he wanted to try before? Hasn't it all crashed. But maybe. Maybe with he and her and Wallace and this idea of a life elsewhere - distant, yes, but more stable that it was before - there's at least a better chance? Because last time it'd been. He hadn't seen the point, as far as he remembers. Because everything came back pressing hard and fast. But she'll slay his dragons. But he's certain Wallace would help. But what if, what if.
It isn't committing to anything. It's not so big as that, and if he thinks of it as something more like minor, maybe, maybe)
He can try. Even a few minutes, which. Isn't much, but it's something, right? His grip around the bottle's neck tightens just slightly, but his voice sounds firm enough. ]
no subject
All of this feels like a lot of responsibility. A lot of oncoming failure. This choice is... small, but it isn't.
He does want to try. (Hasn't he wanted to try before? Hasn't it all crashed. But maybe. Maybe with he and her and Wallace and this idea of a life elsewhere - distant, yes, but more stable that it was before - there's at least a better chance? Because last time it'd been. He hadn't seen the point, as far as he remembers. Because everything came back pressing hard and fast. But she'll slay his dragons. But he's certain Wallace would help. But what if, what if.
It isn't committing to anything. It's not so big as that, and if he thinks of it as something more like minor, maybe, maybe)
He can try. Even a few minutes, which. Isn't much, but it's something, right? His grip around the bottle's neck tightens just slightly, but his voice sounds firm enough. ]
I'll try.
Just... Sure. Yeah. I will. I want to.