ultimatenegative: doesn't mean our brains will change from hand grenades (we check the guns at the door)
Senan Wilkes ([personal profile] ultimatenegative) wrote in [community profile] kingdomsofrain 2021-04-12 05:37 am (UTC)

2/3

Enri, I'm delighted to know you are sane, and are enjoying committing yourself to the capable hands of the most obscene creature on the planet.

Please bear in mind that he bites, and has the filthiest fucking mouth (does he swear in front of you? I'll bet he does), so wash those wounds well lest you find yourself infected with something.

Rabies. Hepatitis A through C. Tetanus. Affection.

We wouldn't want that, now, would we?

Darius is allergic to humanity, impoverishment, and shellfish.

(I'm serious about the shellfish. Don't let him. You're in the fucking Bahamas, and he'll try, because he is an absolute dickhead who thinks himself invincible, and can't keep his grubby paws off a good lobster.)

Beyond that, I wish you a most lovely time doing whatever it is you do, and hope that you, too, have a prized pillow. For your knees, you know.

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