necropolitical: i will protect your name and your heart (if i never sleep again)
necropolitical ([personal profile] necropolitical) wrote in [community profile] kingdomsofrain 2024-02-19 07:40 pm (UTC)

4/4

I neglected to answer so many questions you asked lately. Let me see how much needs response-

We can talk of places where you might like to live. [...] If there is somewhere you happen to share with me, please know that I feel it's necessary to have a birdbath and your head on my shoulder. Hedgehogs, as well.

My arm around you, if you let me.

The questioning from my mother was as you would expect. Where did I meet you, where are you from, who are your parents, etc. I told her only what I felt was reasonably her business. The rest is your own to share. It is guardianship, yes; it's also [...] not appropriate for me to tell people certain things about you.

...It's not safe to 'out' other people here. I don't do it, not even to my family. Talking about your family might have led to that conversation.

[...]

Sex, then.

I can [...] try to answer you.

It's easier if I think of it only as honesty with you and not as [...] being obscene. Somewhat.

It's also easier with vodka.

I have no trouble talking about this in person, or with sex itself; it's seeing the words I've written. Evidence that I've been 'vulgar'.

[...]

I meant that the condom wasn't a demand. Testing isn't optional, but it seems we agree on that matter. I mean to go this week. I don't have any expectations of you; I simply have healthcare here. I don't have health insurance in the States. It's best to do it now.

I have no interest in murdering you or anyone else except the person who said that to you.

[...]

[...]

'Rough' is vague, коханий.

Brutal? No, I won't be able to [...] accommodate you. I don't leave intentional wounds. I don't draw blood.

[...]

But something I've learned, Vevay, is that one of my hands can hold two wrists like yours in place against a wall. Or behind your back. I'm aware of a lot of possibilities that arise because you are so much smaller than I am.

I would never force anything on a lover. But 'forceful' is a different word, isn't that so?

It's a type of 'rough', like the way 'fucking' can be a type of 'making love'.

[...]

I prefer to go slow, forceful. To use my hands and bring my partner over and over, soothe them, excite them again.

There's nothing I wouldn't do for them, within reason.

...Nothing I wouldn't do for you, Vevay.

With someone like you, I take my time so I can feel everything. Every tightening and shiver. How a moan fills a kiss. How my lover draws toward breaking, then burns bright with release.

[...]

'Rough' could also mean 'fast and hard'. That's good sometimes.

Slow and hard is much more fun, though.

[...]

I'll say one thing more, then put my phone down and pretend I didn't type any of that, eh?

I want you, Vevay, in every way I can have you. I want to make you forget any hands but mine. When you're away from me, I want you to feel breathless when you remember what I did to you.

мій коханий, I doubt so many things about myself, but I know where I won't disappoint you at all. 🧡

[...]

The problem is texting about it. :\

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