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Eh fuck it's a fruit, isn't it? Cucumbers, fuckin seeds. Plant of some form, w/e

[ ... ]

Finding more n more there's naught wrong in my dislike for that Madeline, even if dislike's putting it weakish. Wasn't fucking about from the start, was she?

Jesus.

[ ... ]

Fucks me off, what she took from him. Took to grinding down beneath her heel, but it's not end, that, and the sounds say she'll be over soon. He's speaking with with Darius (fuck me, your brother after all, fits right into sense if I'm being honest and I'd imagine anyone knows the pair of you'd say similar), got to think that's leading somewhere toward solution.

Fingers crossed and sights set, anyrate, and I swear to you Senan the man's a wonder to behold. Eh, aye, visually speaking and beyond as well, far beyond. Never seen a soul I better liked, nor a heart more toward my keeping.

[ ... ]

Didn't realize he's got such a name for himself.

Thing of it is, there's nothing in him makes me feel unready, and nowhere I'd not go for him. So there's that for that.

Take her moggy, please and thank you.

[...]

~~Tell her I'll be 'round to see her soon.~~

Tell her I'm not likely to see her for another twenty or so; seems I'll have to remain walking this earth a while yet. But I've married Rin and I'm happy.

And Rin misses her, likewise.

[...]

Fuck, I miss her. Might've said as much a thousand times before. For all the shite parenting in the world - for all that I had one absentee cunt of a father - I was lucky to have her.

I knew it, too, Nova-Love. Knew it and told her until she was sick of hearing it.

I have been remarkably fortunate in family and friends.

[...]

Or tell her I'm still a mardy arse - per the countless times I was called such for brooding over unrequited love.

Whatever suits the moment. Don't forget the moggy, though.

I did not see that coming, incidentally. I truly didn't anticipate the pair of you would be talking shop.

Nevermind that I've had other preoccupations of late in the form of Pippa and Nelli. Avoiding them, shouting at them, threatening them with legal action just to see whether it has any impact. Might as well be flinging pebbles at a wall.

[...]

[...]

Right.

I told Darius to wait, asking Enri to marry him and all, and the doggy asked me why I would advise that. All things being what they are with myself and Rin. He wasn't wrong, though it wasn't something I appreciate hearing from the mouths of babes.

Take your chance, Nova. If you're certain of him and you think he's just as certain of you, don't hesitate, and don't wait until dire circumstances force the words from you.

Fuck Madeline and whatever she might think or do; I'm sure the son's a source of caution, but you know us. You know we'll do right by Vitaly and make certain there's no risk of loss.

[...]

[...]

Insofar as he has a name for himself -

Don't give it a thought. Love has nothing to do with status, gender, fame, class, or any other construct. There's just him, and just you; honest love doesn't give half a fuck about the rest.

[...]

Maybe consider how, for all the name he has, he really rather is in need of someone to look after him in ways Madeline never did. Needs to be loved, him, and it seems you'd like nothing better.

...I'm sure this willingness to go anywhere for him has absolutely nothing to do with musculature, height, nor with the size of the aforementioned cock. Purely intellectual and emotional connection, hey?

Nah, won’t be taking to her the message wrt yourself bein a mardy arse. No need for telling Moira what she’s long known, hey?

Eh, apart from speaking your love for her, which bears repeating always never mind that she’s known it since you could catch arms around her. Can’t let her think she’s escaped hearing that love of yours, aye? Or letting her think you and Rin never put two and two together. Shite she’d’ve been pleased by that. Always did adore your Rin, and fair play to her, never seen them act nor be so eh gracious.

The rest I’ll pass on alongside that moggy.

Might make you yourself a one whilst I’m over. A moggy, that is, gotten not so bad with it, just about the only thing I’ve worked out the making of. Couldn’t go giving her a substandard cake now could I? Granted it ain’t nowhere near the likes of hers, but such goes without saying, given hers was as she herself was, legendary.

There’s few hereabouts she didn’t brighten the lives of. Few you can mention her name around and not get a nod appreciative and a reminiscence.

Any time I visit her, it’s clear it’s not be alone visiting, aye? There’s others do some tidying, leave flowers, messages. …Eh, on which note. Some point, I took to taking photos of the messages. Been meaning to ask if you’d like seeing em? My intention was showing you when next you’re around or I’m in your area, but I’m realizing maybe it’s better you have time with it all.

She was loved fully round. By none better than yourself, but aye, she lives on in what’s spoken and thought on. Thinking she’ll carry on longer than any of us in memory, as well she ought.

Ey, fuckin fairness, that was only the once I took off the continent over looks alone, and that was years back. Also wasn’t advisable, but then I’d been thirstin a bit, and at the time wasn’t much fodder for partnering hereabouts.

Nary a clue what happened with that one, nor’m I interested in learning. Less to his thought than Lolly’s got, which is sayin a thing or two.

…Speaking of. Sounds as though the Big Man’s not got the girls straightened and off your case. Fuck’s he doing over there that’s got him stalled and maungy?

And. Look I’ll make no denial Vitaly’s a man well built and pleasing on the eyes. No denial either I’d like his hands on me, anywhere he cares to reach.

Like my thighs at his shoulders, that too.

Guessing you’ve sussed it already, but fact is I’d go to him without all that attraction in the physical form. Had me eager before I saw a pic of him, had myself intrigued for more. There’s naught in Vitaly I could tire of, and there’s worlds in him for admiring and adoring, both.

For loving, that as well, and always.

It’s truth I’d like to love him. Truth I think I could love and try looking after him, and truth I’d like learning all I can to love him better and better still. Whatsoever difficulties I’ve got wrt my eh insecurities, they’re plenty worth facing down, and he soothes em quiet.

Your own points don’t hurt hearing, themselves, and I thank you for em.

[ … ]

You do know about Sergiy, then. Good and I’m glad, he’s a good lad in a [ … ] eh, not ideal situation. There’s caution around him, aye, and [ … ] I think happens not for so much longer, the way pieces’ve been put in motion. Fingers crossed and all.

Fact is also, I know my certainty and Vitaly’s caught his own. What I mean’s we see one another, and waiting’s carried out together, words are waiting only for that day we meet.

Never been much good at hiding my feelings, myself. This case, it’s no curse and no troubling.

[ … ]

Eh, as there’s little I know of the man, and as I’ll speak no faults to him pointing to the virtues in speakin up, this Enri, he’s an all right one yeah?

[ … ]

[ … ]

Dyou know what. Earlier and then just now, was at the verge of asking how you’re aware of cock’s size, but guess it follows with the Shithead lifestyle. Can’t say I’ve knowledge of it, so you can strike that right of the list of what’s got me ready to take after him.

Won’t say I’m not curious. Also won’t say I’ve burning need to know. Figure that education’ll be met when the time’s right, and truly, there’s naught could turn me off or away, whatever he’s got.

Look here, Nova-Love. Just because mum's in the ground doesn't mean you can test out potentially deadly food experiments on her.

Bakery. I'll pay for it.

Test your moggy on Harp, if he's still knocking about. If he survives, it's safe for public consumption, living and non.

[...]

I'd like to see the messages. I can't promise I won't fall to pieces over them, but I've got Rin to pick me up again. I'd like to have more time to get about the business of visiting, but I've got her photo up and have a word with her now and again.

Most days, truth be told, even if it's only a 'Morning, Mum."

[...]

Anyhow.

Enri's a good one. I can't help but like him; affable little shit, him. Fair warning to you: he isn't nearly as stupid as he plays, nor as harmless. I have the notion that his himbo-leanings are more for the sexual gratification of himself and Darius Precarious; he's too clever by half sometimes.

Do you know, he lied to Rin (and myself) for a year about his ability to comprehend French? I suspected, and then I ceased suspecting, and then he confessed to Rin. A long con if ever there was one.

He's loyal, I'll give him that. You'll like him.

[...]

Go on, then, tell me all about yourself and Vitaly thus far.

Ey. Before I get to answering and before delivering an earful on Vitaly and myself and my prodigious feels for the man

Question for you.

Or eh.

Brief scene followed by a query. There was myself conveying what's a twink to Vitaly, and Vitaly asking if it's like eh this word, чебурашка, right. (Seems it is or there's similarities, but ain't my point rn) Right an I google the term and first thing comes up and I mean full page results fills up's this eh fuckin

Mouse. Creature?

[ At this point in the message, Nova passes along an image of Cheburashka looking like a little shit. ]

Right so here's the question coming in

Tell me it ain’t just me.

That’s Scarface, aye?

Edited 2024-02-28 23:33 (UTC)

Speakin of the creature

Sounds like he's up his arse and hasn't learned to keep from making jest of what ain't funny in the least.

[ ... ]

Sorry to hear it, Sen. Won't ask you're all right, but eh, take care of thyself, hey? Or get Rin to do it, give em that shot to nag.

Here's this for you, as well. Those messages I mentioned. Sending em in a file, give a sec

[ The file arrives, and contains dozens of photographs. Most capture written messages, spanning from two or three words to several pages. Though some have been dampened by rain and there handwriting in others might be called questionable at best, the messages are largely legible. A collection of further photos shows flowers and floral arrangements left for Moira, as well as assorted statuettes and other objects. Of note, the statuettes gather in number as the photos go on; it's clear they've been left unsnagged, and sometimes appear freshly cleaned. ]

Have Rin with you or near when you take that look, I'd advise that and encouragement.

The order for the moggy's placed. It'll be fresh made for her, best in town <3

(Not sayin that'll deter my own experimental moggy makin though finding a test subject's like to prove eh tricky. Harp's a no go, lad's here and all but thing's he swore off so much as touching anything I've laid cookery to after the saute that was and weren't squash.

Well and the pie, as well. Fuck was I to know those werent pecans 😔)

Edited 2024-02-28 23:59 (UTC)

Onto my boyfriend. c: c:

For starters, he’s that to me and I’m the same to him.

Got others words for each other, also. And other words beyond for future savings, eh, times to be or hope for.

I wake reaching for my phone or else it’s in my hand already, never let it go, and then it’s us back and forth the day through, and truth is I’ve an endless store of words for him and words I want to share his way.

Got more pics of him. >_> May’ve sent some his way of my tattoo, eh, and also that night at that pub with the rude fuck of a bouncer

Showed him Erid c: [ … ] …Might play for him? Said he’d like it, and lord god knows I’d like to do it. Eh, the way I feel music’s guess I’d say vivid, like tremulous most days, but talking with him it’s gone deeper still, I’m playing and feeling strains the way I feel him, from heart to my fingertips.

Fuckin wondrous, what he does to the world, brings it colours into song.

[ … ]

Full disclosure, just spent can’t count how long looking out the window thinkin on him. Fuckin smiling to myself, and Iryna ain’t wrong sayin we’re speaking like teenagers but thing is as well there’s naught wrong with it, nor with feeling butterflies past forty.

Man’s got something of the dork to him, can’t be denied and can only me admired by my own self, valued aye, it’s in my nature needing a bit of that. Lot of that, happens.

Finding it’s in my nature also needing to see his laugh. Hear his laugh, fuckin nearly ended me, and aye, one of those first pics he sent he’s sat with Dodo, she defyin physics and he with a laugh like joy itself.

Still got that one as my lock screen, that’s fact.

Other pic of him, this one other pic’s he his brother and a cousin at the gym and Senan I’m not jesting in the least sayin he can lift 205 kilos goin off his admission, and I’ve nary a doubt it’s so. Mean to find out for myself someday 🥴

J e s u s christ alive the man near to knocked me out this morning, message he sent
Still reeling over that one, apt to be weak kneed the next week. Sheer poetry of the explicit’s what it was. Eh don’t mean graphic nor what’s the tab a slot b shite, there’s place for that but it grows old right quick and fuck me there’s naught but newness to the ways he talks flirtation.

(Might be right to apologise here to yourself, but I’m not an ounce of sorry so best I can do’s salute you for followin this far and through the risque thicket.)

Here’s a thing, and you know I go mardy spending enough time around anyone with an overflow of brains and status, that about he having a name for himself aye, but fuck me if he ain’t bright beyond bright, and fuck me as well, talkin with him I don’t feel less than, eh, not too fuckin dense myself. [ … ] More properly stated, it don’t cross my mind at all, that about my own intelligence ~~or eh lackings thereof~~, when he and I’re speaking. This after only a week, aye? It’s unprecedented, is what it is.

And, truth, unprecedented’s what he is.

Then and on his son [ … ] eh, look I know all’s early and living’s got a way for coming between what is and what ought to be. Aye it’s been a week but as well eh I don’t care much a fuck and like you said, what good’s in hesitating here? Beyond what’s needed, ofc, caution and Sergiy keeping foremost.

But eh. Presuming a future where the contract with her, [ … ] Madeline, where that contract’s proven fucked and over with, and when he gets free of her and all’s secure

We’ve not not been talking future maybes.

Living together. Being [ … ] [ … ] ah fuck me. [ … ] Being a family.

He and I. Sergiy. Dodo.

[ … ]

Just as well, he’s said [ … ] well and might be you can guess this, but eh. He [ … ] isn’t opposed [ … ]

Look, fuck. Said if it were eh, hypothetically. If Liza and Nicky ever need a place and’d like [ … ] and even if it’s a room for visiting? He said he’d welcome them. Love them, aye? Said as well even if, eh [ … ] regardless what happens between he and I, said he’ll do all he can so I can see them again.

[ … ]

[ … ]

Can’t talk on that longer rn I’m thinking, it’s [ … ] Eh you know how it is.

Here, eh. That about living, maybe a future shared somewhere together. There’s been thought on the where and what’d work and eh, ey what’s thinkin, Sen? Room enough for one more Yorkshireman in NYC?

[ … ]

Nah, I’m flummoxed for speakin just now. Sent a novel as it is, more I’d say but truth of the matter’s I’ll need a breath for composing myself.

Here but. Goes for saying and I want to say in all of this

I’ve faith in him, is part what I’m saying.

And I love him, true and certain.

That's Darius, without a doubt. Small, liable to cause nightmares.

Why were you explaining 'twink' to Vitaly? That's his type. He knows well enough what it is.

[...]

Although I suppose he hasn't properly been part of the 'scene' for a decade. Good on you, giving him a robust education.

Trust you me, I know the inherent irony in what I'm about to say:

Vitaly talks too much.

[...]

Thank you for the messages. And [...] the rest.

[...]

Fucking Darius, throwing a tantrum because I won't let him make some grand announcement that Darcy-fucking-Scarlett is my father.

Like as not, he doesn't know what's on just now; who can say when he was ever sober enough to commit it to memory before. I don't like being at odds with him, but I truly am at my wits' fucking end.

Not with him, really.

It's a heap.

[...]

He didn't need to fling himself atop it, little shit.

[...]

You know what they'll say of her, Deforest leading the choir of them at the top of his rancid lungs. More decent than anyone, her, and diametrically opposed in character, him, but she'll be lambasted. Privileges of being a woman, and poor, and having the nerve to be born to a black mother, herself.

It isn't that she'd care, herself. She was masterful at not giving two shits about that talk.

Me, though.

There's already a queue of people circling the block twice who'd like to see Deforest torn into tiny petulant pieces. One word out of him and I'm apt to give them all a reason to celebrate.

It would be so much easier to get through this curled around a bottle of the same shit that ruined my liver in the first place.

[...]

~~That's not fair. The hepatitis played a large role, I imagine.~~

Anyhow.

Nova, what's this about your intelligence, then? Why would you feel anything less than? You're one of the bright ones.

[...]

Have we had this conversation before? This feels familiar. Was I intoxicated? What did I say? Fuck it. I was right.

You trust Vitaly's instincts. Most of them. Don't trust him about women, apparently. But if he's in love with you like you say you are with him, it's not likely at all that he finds you dull. Watch him next time he's around a known lackluster source - Verne, the twins. He's as polite as they come, but after a while, he gets a look on his face like he's trying to hide how painful the conversation's grown.

He can only bear sheer stupidity in the short term.

[...]

You'll be a fine family, the three and then some of you. Presumably there's a sore spot in there same as with Mum just now, so we'll acknowledge they land in the "and then some".

I'm glad to see you so happy, Nova-Love. He's an earnest one who might just deserve the likes of you.

Nah, he worries over you, the both of you or that’s the sound of it. Likely ain’t news to you, many years as it sounds you’ve known him.

wrt Godsmacked, seems like flingin himself onto shitburnt blazes is a perpetual habit, if not the very nature of the man. That and failing to figure in hisself being mortal or those around him having lives and consequences all of their own

Not sure the man knows how to be a man meaning man upon this earth, or else not publicly or not when I’ve seen him. No surprise he’s got shite for interpersonal skills outside whatever it is he’s got for business

That heap and jangled wits you mentioned though. Anything I can do for helping there? Sense I get’s you’ve a lot going on, and if there’s little I can do across the sea, might be something whilst I’m over hey?

One way or any other, you’ll work it out with him. Lord Of The Shitheads he may be, but what’s clear’s he always had a [ … ] dunno if it can be called a soft spot, but an adherence, eh affection, that’s it, for yourself

Called myself a twink is how I got to explaining it and eh, seems he’s just not come across the word itself and Ukrainian’s not got a common equivalent

Working at learning it, by the by. Ukrainian, that is, and ofc and as well learning a Ukrainian c; He the one and only, aye my one and only.

My Talik.

[ … ]

:D

He’s let me call him so, dyou see? Been keeping it back these texts past, but truth’s it’s good to [ …] write out loud, guess there’s no speaking component rn, but I’ll offer up it’s a real right name for speaking to myself and to the walls and any spirit that may hear.

Be good to speak it to him, truth.

[ … ]

Be good to have that family. Fingers crossed and circumstances willing and all [ … ] Aye but even should circumstances tend awry, impression I get’s we’ll find our way. He’s not a man for discarding what it is he ~~loves~~ takes to. Cares for. Loves.

[ … ]

Eh and alongside all that learning, you’re right suggesting I’m doing that teaching as well, and I mean to give Talik all the education he can sustain, which I’m guessing’s a good deal

He does make me feel, eh, bright. Brilliant in a way, that’s so, and not lacking in the least. Leastwise, thus far I don’t get the sense I’ve got him bored or anything like

[ … ]

Fairness sake, anyone can keep ears and mind on Lolly and the girls’ve got the will and patience of the saints. Eh, myself excluded, don’t think it’s patience accounts for that so much as habit and sake of affection. Daft buggers they may be, but they’re my daft buggers, as saying goes.

Aye and then, what’d you say whilst blistered in that convo of yore? Mm, believe it was to do with find Burn Bridge on the map’n you’d give up all the universe’s secrets c;

Nah, think you ken yourself I’d’ve been no more sober, meaning fuck if I recall and any such words’ve gone lost to the ages. That being said, my guess’d be the gist weren’t far from your saying now, as it’s always been yourself giving affirmations that way, eh, about brightness or elsewise.

Appreciate you, Senan. Always and then some.

Ey, you smoke at all these days?

Meaning of the blissed out spliffed up sort. Figure as you can’t spend yourself in drinking, might be we take a night blazed in Moira’s honour. Speaking of her til early hours, yourself Rin and I, whoever else’d be for joining or whoever you’d like there. If it strikes you well at all, ofc

Well and I’ll be gathering the green either way, got to meet up with Fennick for a trade off as is, might as well grab supplies while I’m at it and assuming she’s not skipped town.

[ … ]

Fuck she might’ve done haven’t heard back in days, thinking on it now. Eh well I’ll sort it one way or another, suppliers abound among acquaintances and rogues no worries there

Point bein. Like to spend a night remembering your mum if it suits yourself, no harm no hurt one way or any other.

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